Happy December!!

Happy December!! 

Time flies really fast and it's already the end of another year. I remember exactly what one of the fourth grade teachers told me in fourth grade: "When you realize that time is flying fast, then you are getting old."  Ha!  I never understood twas a possible complaint until these past few years.  Frankly, I am not sure if it's getting old or the freedom to do more things because we are grown.  Making choices and narrowing things down to fit our 24 hour day is not an easy thing.  More importantly, in order to do something well, even if it's just one thing, it will take quite a bit of time and devotion.  

Recently, someone I knew for a long time said to me that I was the only person amongst the people they knew that complains about growing up.  Perhaps so.  However from this statement, I knew we have different types of friends.  Amongst my friends, and they may not be as many as they have, but there are times and circumstances that my friends mention the difficulties of growing up.  Then, my best friend who is now a happy mother of two posted this article today on FB and this hit home!  The article talks about how a small child's world is so small that they are afraid to lose their favorite thing, and the psychology that is behind that.  For small children, when they lose what they enjoy playing with, they get insecure of the unknown.  As a small child, we don't know much, therefore we have all the time in the world.  Whoa, this article  brought up quite some things grown ups can relate...

Then I realized, we never really grow out of a child-like mentality.  I dare challenge even further to say: it's just a humanistic mentality. Because as grown ups, if one cares about each other or something, then we will weather through all storms and celebrations together.  For a child, that could be their blanket, their stuffed animal, their bottle, or their stepping stool... Then we we grow up, we change our attachment to work, fame, money, good friends, siblings, and or significant other.  But longevity, only comes when we put in effort and time -- all types of relationships will take work.  People may only have tolerance for work, making money, keeping their fame, just family, just friends, just significant other, and some none of the above.  Important thing of growing up is being able to develop healthy relationships in all areas of our life by communicating effectively and freely.  

Remembering seeing this quote: "The biggest communication problem is that we do not listen to understand.  WE listen to reply."  Damn!!   Whoa.. another one that hit home!! I realized that growing up is an endless process as we will always learn.  Interesting conversations are definitely not easy to come by.  Having a good soulful conversation is not easy to come by - personally I would like it once a month.  Then I realized how many times I fail to understand the communication of those close to me, maybe more than I would like - yes I do listen just to reply.  My beloved father once told me, "Slow down and take a breath."  Listening to what is said for understanding is so important!!  And this art, I am learning.  I should never be judgmental and keep in mind that we all came down different paths filled with different experiences.  To this point, I have been pleasantly surprised by strangers with a fulfilling soulful conversation many times.  Going forward, I will focus to understand all conversations I have.  Even more with those I care for deeply.  Therefore, I will slow down and be present because lesson learned that EVERYONE offers something to learn.  

i'm sure there is much to go on and much more perspectives in which i am so curious to hear.  more importantly I would love to hear people's experience and their thoughts.