Well... surgery went well on Thursday, May 9th for this broken ankle that has been endless. From what I heard if was under two hours time. Originally, the doctor mentioned the placing of a plate, screws and bone graft. Successfully they didn't put a plate in, but three screws and bone graft as mentioned. I was woken up from the surgery while they were still bandaging me up. Then into the recovery room, I saw my mom and brother come in. Both had a look of relief from their worry of me going under and hoping that all would go well. Thank God, and my dad, that it all did.
What I was told was the doc said a min of 6 weeks I would be no weight-bearing on my left foot. Additionally, no toe moving too. Who would have thought that moving the toes would be such an ordeal. And home bound that is. But the stitches will be removed after two weeks. Then I shall see what was done and put into my ankle. The splint that it's currently in is quite the heavy thing, even though it does not fully wrap my whole leg. And it does come right up to two inches below my knee. I understand the need to hold the ankle in place, but the weight of it doesn't help much. It's only been one week, and I feel cut off from the society. And the dreary weather of New York doesn't help the bone matters. Seems that going outside is just very cumbersome. Really no weight bearing is quite the task. On top of fighting our human natural reflexes. Not easy. Upon stitch removal, I am very curious to see how it looks, how long was the cut.... and how will it heal once the stitches are off. Of course, how are the screws placed in my fibula is more and more of a curious point. However, nowadays, keeping it elevated is key to prevent pain. Quite some pain. Except even keeping it elevated also means pain, just much lighter degree. Elevation also means lie down. In another week or so, being able to see what it is may be a good thing... i think. Of course, only time will tell. Praying for a speedy and real full recovery without further damage ado!
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So.. the surgery for my ankle was moved up to last Thursday, May 9. Very fortunate to have it moved up. At the same token, I had to cram everything in the 1.5 weeks time after being notified.
Surgery went fine, and the easy part is now over. Recovery started when I woke up from the surgery. The nerve block lasted for about 36 hours, from time of administration. And learning to not use weight on this leg at all was far more difficult than I thought. This is a good reason why I try to stay away from the pain killers, without feeling it, I wouldn't know if I am using that leg at all. However, sleep will be a time that I will use pain killer to rest. During the day, I will take when necessary. Having feeling is quite important. Just this morning I didn't think i was applying weight on it, but i felt the screws inside my ankle and it hurt!! Damn, I felt it all and the instant feeling is how weak that bone is at the moment. My mother is just enduring this whole thing now, whom I thank for and appreciate her help. Despite her own fatigue and helplessness as she is still grieving at the loss of my father, she has been doing her best to help out. As no parent in the right mind would want to see their child going through a surgical procedure of any sort. Rest and allowing it to recover well and smooth is the only focus I need to have now. Get healthy again and keep it. This broken ankle has taken so much of me and people close to me. To those all who stood by me to help and support me, I thank you. Wow.. time sure does fly, and not at the same time...
It's been a very trying few weeks and an emotional struggle. These past few months of capped and limited mobility has made it very difficult to deal with anything. What is a simple injury has turned into something that will take a long time and a specific due course to recover. This broken ankle from my normal routine of morning running is just not willing to heal on its own and additionally ultimately bringing me to the surgery table again. Now we are a month away from surgery. This month will fly by and yet go as slow as can be. The emotional tidal wave is unstoppable, but the emotional growth when i come out of this may be fruitful. All depending on how it goes. Seems the road to begin recovery is not as short as I would have wanted. It's quite scary to know that after surgery and for the sake of recovery and the long run, I will not be able to walk with my own legs and feet for a period of time: 2~3 months, maybe longer. Even though the ankle that is injured is not my driving foot, but I still won't be able to drive out anyways. Resting and working from home is the option. In the midst of this all, I am very appreciative of having a home, family, and friends. These are the treasures that we will always be able to take with us to the grave. Life isn't all that bad because of that. However, for the first time, I get just a sliver of taste of what my dad went through - just in a VERY different perspective. today is the first day of spring... and never have i felt depressed on this day. the weather was interestingly enough also very wonky. started of as kinda warm in the morning and then got relatively cooler in the afternoon.
and the sadness will grow.. but that comes with much frustration of this broken ankle that just isn't healing. and not only that it's causing other problems as well. i'm not a doctor, but seems to me that broken bones are pretty common of an injury. I really don't understand how my doctor could have messed this up. i just really don't understand. at this point, i will be switching doctors entirely. it's almost been a year and still really no progression at all since month 2. don't really know what else to say or think. it's not only frustrating at this point, but there's some anger and sad a lot.. a lot. sometimes it's hard to smile. fortunately i have a job that i like and enjoy the coworkers i work with. i mean my salary is such crap, but at least i have a job and we get along! okay.. no more complaints.. i have some worries about seeing the new doctor. but faith i will have. and being positive will win me half the battle! =) wow.. time flies whether you are not doing things you like or not, whether you have a choice or not.. it just flies.
seems just yesterday I broke my ankle, and i was hopeful that i would be up and running again soon in spring 2019. well.. unfortunately there seem to be some bad judgement calls from my doc, and now i am looking at surgery to have my ankle heal. while this is the plan ahead, the complications and the headaches keep on coming. and somehow, from the beginning i had a feeling this would be how it would go down. now... here we are. however, if i am going to have this surgery, it will not be done by the same doctor. i am going to head to Hospital for Special Surgery (HSS). and doctors in HSS are crazy busy and hard to get an appointment with. so while i called last month as soon as my doctor told me that a surgery would be needed for recovery, the appointment i got is the end of this month. seems quite common to get a doctor's appointment so far out at this place. in the mean time, i am to make sure that i protect this part of my body and not make it worse. so far, it doesn't look like I am doing a good job with it. that's the sad part... as much as i feel like i know quite a bit of my body, there is far more that i am learning now in the progress of my ankle injury. just last week, i had just come out of being crazy busy for the past month at work. working to set up a conference is really quite a bit of work. including working on presentation deck for the conference, it was definitely a time i was losing my mind. when it was all done, some of the things that i needed to attend to kept me on my feet quite a bit. at that point, i wasn't thinking anymore. i had been on this auto-drive mode for a while now. there wasn't much capacity to go running given my injury and the way my days were shaped.. well weeks. in reality, i had been walking around everywhere that it really didn't matter if i ran or not. my ankle was getting plenty of exercise. plenty, indeed! so what happens next? by the time last weekend hit, not only my ankle, but my whole lower leg (from my left knee down to my ankle) said: "nope, we're done!" the pain was intense and excruciating that i wasn't able to sleep. the doctor told me to keep off my feet and let it rest for a week. instantly also gave me a note for work. i must say, in these past two days being off my feet did help in lessening the pain. it's not all gone, but i am able to sleep now and hobble around. whew... at least no more crutches like i needed on Monday. and i gotta say, crutches absolutely HARD WORK!!! i'm sure this is all also because i am so so so out of shape. Damn! well... we now know that none of this is easy. so to everyone, please be careful when you walk, run, or anything that you do. our human body is very fragile. Patience is a virtue.
Indeed true. Seems the older I get, while I have practiced some patience but when it comes to the healing of the body, it's still very lacking. This break in the ankle which is normally to take between 6 months to a year of recovery, is just too long. But what makes it harder is the fact that tendonitis has developed on the same ankle for months.. fine line I am walking. (heehee.. no puns intended) I never thought that I would be in a place where for long months I would be unable to jog or run the way I enjoy it. The body's addiction of the hormones of a runner's high has become quite immense. I had not even realized how much I enjoy the runner's high, more importantly it really kept my balance of mind, spirit, and body. Amen. Without being sick one wouldn't realize the importance of being healthy and the importance of every body part. I just can't quite say this enough times. Just seems that through this period of recovery, I am to learn some important lessons during the recovery of this injury. Learning to not be dependent on some things. That life some times throws curve balls at us and all we can do is catch it. Actually without a choice too. (LOL) But during this time, it certainly helps me focus on doing some of the things that I had always wanted to do. When I was healthy in mobility, I was often too spastic and not calm enough to do all that I wanted to do. I am definitely in need to learn to balance it. As someone who loves her balance, this is a very good lesson to learn. While exercising is great, and one of the things I love, but reading is just as great too! I never learned to appreciate reading until recent years. There's quite a long lost years of reading in my life. Now catching up the readings that I want to do, while also continue to write. :) My stitches are out!!!
Two weeks after oral surgery and have bone graft to my jaw bone, the stitches cam out yesterday. While the bone isn't all ready for me to consume normal food, and it still needs a couple of weeks or so before the gun can lost all the swelling, but it definitely feels a lot looser and at ease without the stitches in it. The bone will take about 3-4 months before an implant will be ready to go in. Even better, I am off antibiotics!! Man.. yes i heard that there would be antibiotics involved but I didn't think it would be out of the ordinary in terms of just normal dosage and what not. In fact it was really strong dosage and for about two weeks time. I have avoided antibiotics the best to my abilities for the past few years.. and bang! This oral surgery with jaw bone graft came in, and I was on 1500 mg of antibiotics a day for two weeks. Gees... So now that I am off antibiotics, a detox should come along to clear and restore my good healthy bacteria and cleanse the antibiotics out of my system. Weekend went with oral surgery.. bone grafted a small part of the jaw bone. Today would be the fifth day of antibiotic. The powerful antibiotics plays what role in the body is yet to be discovered.
The bone graft of the jaw bone has quite a recovery time. Therefore, it's something that will require time. Who would've thought that simply raising blood pressure would bring bleeding to the wound. For a couple of days the blood pressure was to be kept stable so it wouldn't cause bleeding. Dental health is vital to overall body health. A hard lesson to learn but definitely learnt. On top of that, never keep an infection in the body long... it's just NOT wise. No job is important than clearing one's infection from their own body. Pain killer is not meant to be taking long as well. Sometimes, feeling the pain is a healthy thing because it allows me to gage where and how the surgery is progressing. Fortunately it's just a smart... after all this time, just a small thing -- it's a blessing. Chasing time... continue to chase time will last for another month or so.
About a year ago, this wise elderly lady had told me that grieving can be difficult on the body. She had explained to me that she had ended up with a toe infection that lasted for a while. And it was one of those things that was not something common to have happened to her. What she meant was that this would apply to those who were close and tended to the deceased. She went on to explain to me that she had a month of endless tears. The main difference is she lost her husband and I lost my father. She had all these words and experiences that she had been through. Her words were appreciated at the time. Now.. makes me wonder. At times things cannot be explained. |
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